


Breakers

by shieldmyheart



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, College, Drunken Shenanigans, F/M, Getting Back Together, Love Confessions, Reader-Insert, Spring Break, hook ups and make ups, it's party time
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-15
Updated: 2016-07-05
Packaged: 2018-07-15 07:52:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7213996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shieldmyheart/pseuds/shieldmyheart
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spring break was meant for relaxing by the pool and partying with friends, not falling back in love with your ex.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Baggage

“We leave for Florida tonight,” you said into the phone that was pressed to your ear.

 

You zippered up your backpack as you listened to your mother’s worried response and sighed when she mentioned for the _fifth_ time in this conversation statistics about girls going missing during their spring break. You knew she meant well and only offered these facts as protection for you but there was a limited number of times you could have the same exchange – and she was toeing the line at this point.

 

“Mom,” you cut across her before she could get into her spiel about human trafficking (she always seemed to watch _Taken_ at the most inopportune times). “I gotta go to my last mid-term. I’ll text you once we leave, ok? Yes, I love you too. Bye Mom.”

 

You ended the call, stuffing the phone into your back pocket as you slung the bag over your shoulder. You left your room and headed down the hall to the next door which was cracked open. You nudged it with your foot and entered the room, plopping down on one of the beds as Natasha continued to rummage through her closet, unperturbed by your entrance.

 

“Still not packed?” you asked lightly, noting the half full suitcase that lay open in the middle of the floor.

 

“For your information, I finished packing two days ago.” She stood up, apparently finding what she was looking for and dropped it into the suitcase. “But Wanda’s a bit behind,” she commented, gesturing to the bag.

 

“Where is she now?”

 

“She’s got two mid-terms today,” Nat replied from in front of the dresser where she was gathering the last of Wanda’s toiletries. “Told her I’d finish this up for her before we left for ours.”

 

“Why weren’t you this nice to me when we lived in the dorms?”

 

Your smile let Nat know you were being playful and she let one appear on her face, too. “Because I knew you had your shit together.”

 

You both chuckle at the memories of your time as dorm mates your freshman year of college. It took a few weeks for the two of you to feel comfortable around each other but once your walls had come down, you were inseparable. Fast forward three years and you were still important figures in each other’s lives.

 

Nat finished putting Wanda’s belongings into her luggage and flipped the top of the bag closed with her foot as she passed by it to get to her desk. After picking up her book-bag and phone, she asked “Ready?” to which you hopped off the bed and led the way out of your shared apartment.

 

“So what time are Sam and the others supposed to be meeting us?” you inquired while you two walked the short distance to campus.

 

“I told them to be ready to leave no later than four. Knowing them, though, we’ll be lucky if we make our flight.”

 

You rolled your eyes knowing full well your guy friends were the worst when it came to being on time. “Only because one of them will undoubtedly forget their toothbrush.”

 

“And need to grab a _third_ pair of sunglasses.”

 

“Or unplug their Xbox so it doesn’t overheat.”

 

“Or reapply their cologne.”

 

You stifled a laugh behind your hand as you entered the academic building where your mid-term was taking place. These were all excuses the boys had used in the past for their lateness. Their need to procure forgotten items at the last minute became a running joke between you, Natasha and Wanda much to the boys’ chagrin. It was all in good-nature and made for funny anecdotes to tell at later times.

 

That was one of the things you were looking forward to the most on this trip with them all. You just wanted to spend some quality time with people you cared about, make memories that would last forever. You were prepared to make this the best trip ever, even if it meant reluctantly spending time with your ex. That’s what happens when your group of friends is the same and you plan your vacation together.

 

Things didn’t end as terribly as they could but it still hurt to be around the guy who you’d given yourself to wholeheartedly. Since your break-up five months prior, you and Bucky had tread around each other delicately. It had been difficult at first since you shared the same friend circle – people choosing sides; awkward bump-ins in the halls and at parties – but as time went on you two learned how to navigate campus with minimal interaction. It had put a strain on your friends when trying to do things as a group but they were willing to go along with the plan if it made you and Bucky happy.

 

“Hey, you okay?” Natasha’s voice brought you out of your reverie. You snapped your eyes over to her, worry marring her features.

 

“Yeah, just thinking about break…”

 

A knowing look passed over her face as she set a caring hand on your arm and gave it a small squeeze. “We can bail, if you want. I know a cool place we can go to instead.”

 

You waved away her comment as you two settled into seats in the lecture hall for your exam. “Nah, it’s not worth the hassle. But thanks anyway, Nat.”

 

She seemed to want to say something else on the matter -- and to be honest you hoped she wouldn’t only so you didn’t have to delve deeper into the feelings that arose when thinking about Bucky --but instead gave a quick smile before Professor Fury entered the room and the exam began.

* * *

“I saw you pack this bag and it _did not_ look this heavy.”

 

Sam dragged the large navy suitcase across the room and dropped it by the front door, turning to glare at his roommate.

 

“What?” Bucky replied casually with a shrug. “I need options.”

 

The eye roll directed towards him did not go unnoticed. Sam could complain all he wanted; Bucky just wanted to be prepared for whatever might happen on this trip – and for him, he was hoping it was all good things.

 

“Man, we’re going on a cruise in the Bahamas. Shorts, tees and flip-flops are all you need,” Sam continued, heading towards the kitchen. “You’ve got the whole men’s department from Macy’s in there.”

 

“Listen, when you have a beer pong mishap and need a fresh shirt to put on, don’t come crying to me because you only packed four outfits.”

 

“It’s called ‘packing the essentials’,” said Sam before sipping on the sports drink he had pulled from the fridge. “Besides, I’m not planning on wearing those clothes often.”

 

He arched an eyebrow and smirked around the top of his bottle. Bucky chuckled knowing full well Sam’s plans for the next week and how they mostly involved him chasing after Natasha. The two of them had been eyeing each other for months with neither of them taking the first step – their entire group had a bet going to see which of the two would finally get the courage to speak up. Sam was one of Bucky’s best friends but his money was firmly on Nat.

 

“Let me know how that goes for you.”

 

A plastic bottle cap hurtled towards Bucky’s face but he ducked before it could make contact, letting out a laugh in the process. He picked up the top and flicked it back at Sam who caught it effortlessly in his left hand.

 

“Show off,” Bucky mumbled as he moved to unplug the Xbox from the wall outlet, fearful his prized possession might combust while they were away. His back pocket vibrated, alerting him to an incoming message on his phone. He pulled out the device and read the text from his other best friend.

 

“Steve’s out front.”

 

Sam downed the rest of his drink and tossed the bottle into the trash before he and Bucky grabbed their bags to leave the apartment. Down on the street, Steve waited in his SUV, windows half open to let in the crisp spring air. They loaded their bags into the trunk alongside Steve’s before hopping into the vehicle, Bucky taking the front passenger seat while Sam settled in the middle row.

 

“Do the girls know we’re on our way?” Bucky asked as Steve pulled into traffic.

 

“I called Nat right before texting you,” the blonde answered. “I’m sure they’ll be waiting curbside for us.”

 

“I’m surprised you didn’t pick them up first,” Sam said leaning forward. “You know how they like to rag on us when we’re running late.”

 

“Good thing we’re not.”

 

“Or else we wouldn’t hear the end of it this whole week,” added Bucky with a grin.

 

Despite the current nature of his relationship with you, Bucky always found your teasing endearing. The thought of you mocking him about his game console, a wide smile on your pink lips and eyes bright with amusement, always appealed to him.

 

The ride to your apartment only took ten minutes and to no one’s surprise, you, Nat and Wanda stood waiting for the SUV patiently.

 

“Good timing,” Nat commented leaning against Bucky’s door. “No forgotten toothbrushes this time?”

 

“We’re on top of our game today,” Steve replied pushing the button to release the trunk door.

 

Bucky took this opportunity to watch you put your belongings away through the rearview mirror. You looked beautiful today, your hair swept back allowing the sun to gently caress your face; but what was new about that? To him, you always looked stunning. He must have been staring too hard and too long because Steve cleared his throat as he met Bucky’s eye in the mirror. Bucky tore his eyes away from the glass, running a hand through his dark hair. He needed to keep himself in check during this trip and not get caught in your unshakeable hold over him again.

 

You and Wanda climbed into the car uttering a greeting to everyone then settled into the rear row seats while Natasha took the spot next to Sam. Bucky sneaked a glance at you through the mirror once more but you were turned to Wanda as the two of you exchanged words. He looked away only to have Steve stare at him with a raised brow.

 

“Just drive,” Bucky mumbled, folding his arms across his chest in a huff. He sank down into his seat, one foot propped on the dashboard, and wondered how he was going to survive the next seven days.


	2. High Spirits

The nearly three-and-a-half-hour flight to Miami gave you plenty of time to wonder about the entertainment the following week promised. This was your last spring break as a college student; every one after this would have to be planned meticulously around a work schedule. These next few days were your last to truly live free without the cloud of responsibility hanging over you. You planned to fully immerse yourself in every moment of your trip, burn them into your memory.

The view from the penthouse suite you all were sharing was definitely a memory you wanted to keep. You leaned closer to the railing of the balcony, looking across the bright expanse of the city below. The twinkling multi-colored lights were mesmerizing. You heard the patio door slide open and moments later had Wanda and Natasha flanking you on either side.

“I never want to leave,” you breathed struck by the beauty of your surroundings. “Do you think your parents would mind us just staying here forever?”

You turned to Wanda when she let out a small laugh. “I’m sure I could convince them.”

“You’ll have to thank them for us again,” chimed Nat. “This is definitely a step up from the motel I had picked.”

“The motel wouldn’t have been bad, though. I mean, we’re only staying here for three nights.”

“Yeah but can you imagine the six of us cramped in a tiny motel room for that long?” Nat said with a quirk of her brow.

Images of shared beds, fights over the bathroom, and tripping over too many bags flooded your mind. “You’re right; the penthouse life is _way_ better.”

“Well you guys can thank them yourselves,” Wanda said as she pulled out her phone. “I need to call them anyway.”

She opened her video chatting app and called home. Within moments the face of Tony Stark appeared on the screen, machinery surrounding him and grease spots on his face.

“Am I interrupting tinker time?” Wanda asked.

“No, you’re providing the perfect distraction.” He smiled widely at his daughter before continuing. “How are you? Any problems on the flight? Is the suite ok?”

“I’m fine and everything’s great. Taylor and Nat want to say something.”

She turned the phone so that you and Natasha were in frame. You waved at Mr. Stark. “Thanks again for setting this up for us, Mr. Stark.”

“We really appreciate it,” added Nat, leaning over your shoulder to get a better view of the phone.

“Don’t worry about it; anything for my favorite kid.”

“I heard that!” someone shouted in the background.

“Is that Pietro?” Wanda mused pulling the phone back.

As she took the time to talk with her family, you and Natasha left Wanda on the balcony and ventured back into the living room. Steve and Sam stood at the counter in the adjacent kitchenette, multiple bottles and cups lining the marble top.

“Looks like someone found the bar,” Nat noted hopping onto the edge of the counter and taking a plastic cup in hand.

“It’s our last spring break together; might as well start it off right,” replied Steve handing you a cup as you entered the small space.

“Cheers to that,” you said lifting the cup to your lips.

“Cheers to what?”

Bucky came into the room with a fresh set of clothes on, his brown hair still dripping from the shower he just finished. You busied yourself with making another drink to keep from staring at the way his pants hung loose on his hips or the sliver of skin on his abdomen that showed when his arms moved. Sam shot you a quizzical look as you poured more vodka into your cup but you ignored him as you added in the cranberry juice.

“Our swan song,” you heard Nat say in response.

With your refreshed drink in hand, you moved around the counter to stand by Sam and kept your eyes from drifting over to where Bucky stood by Steve. You drank more than half of the purplish concoction, the sting of the liquor burning your throat, when you started to feel its effects. Your empty stomach only aided in the swiftness of the alcohol’s power.

“So is this how the entire trip is gonna be?” asked Sam, his back against the counter so he could face you.

“What do you mean?” You lifted your gaze to meet his brown eyes.

He crossed his arms over his chest and cocked his head towards the others. “You and Buck tiptoeing around each other.”

“We’re not avoiding one another; we’re just giving each other space.”

“I don’t think your wandering eyes got the memo.”

“You’re one to talk, Mr. I’ve-Been-Pining-After-Nat-For-Nine-Months-And-Am-Too-Scared-To-Make-A-Move.”

“Touché.” He drank from his own cup before continuing. “But at least Nat and I can still hold a normal conversation. You two have barely spoken to each other.”

It was true. Except for a handful of greetings, Bucky and you had not spoken more than five words to each other in weeks. But it was better this way. You didn’t have to worry about saying the wrong thing if you just didn’t talk at all. It was awkward sharing the same space and friends without acknowledging each other but that was what you’d agreed on, wasn’t it? 

You took a sip of your drink, knowing Sam was waiting for a reply even though you didn’t have one to give; thankfully Wanda saved the day when she came back inside and announced the pizzas she’d ordered earlier were finally here.

“I’ll help,” you offered when she asked if anyone wanted to go down to the lobby with her to get the food.

You downed the rest of your drink and hurried after the other woman. By the time the two of you came back to your suite, the others were lounging in the living room with the music blasting. Cries of joy and applause rang out when you brought the boxes over and dropped them on the coffee table. You settled on the floor by Natasha’s legs and grabbed a slice of cheese pizza, biting into the gooey surface. 

As you all ate – finally feeding yourselves after a day of travel – Steven and Sam kept the drinks flowing from cup to cup. By the time you stuffed yourself with several slices, you’d also downed three more drinks. At this point you were feeling silly and lighthearted as you laughed at the jokes being thrown around. It was good being in this room with these amazing people. You loved them _so_ much.

Once the food was gone, someone suggested a dip in the pool for a night swim and it was honestly the best idea you’d ever heard in your entire life. You and Wanda scrambled to the bedroom you were sharing – giggling and bumping into each other on the way – to put on your swimsuits. After several failed attempts at tying your top by yourself and having Wanda come to your rescue (she too having some difficulty), you were finally ready to hit the pool.

Everyone met in the foyer of the suite clad in swim trunks and bathing suits, towels strewn over shoulders. You linked arms with Wanda and Steve as the six of you made your way down a few floors to the pool level. Natasha led the way, reading the directional signs on the walls and only getting you lost a handful of times. When you found the right corridor – _finally!_ – you all rushed for the doors, boasting of who could get there first. Steve ended up the winner but when he tried pulling the door open, he was met with nothing.

“Lemme try,” Bucky slurred brushing past Steve. He heaved on the handles with both hands to no avail. He turned around with a pout on his face that made you chuckle.

“Guys,” Nat started pausing a moment to belch. “We need our key room—room key.”

You all turned to where she was pointing to a small black box on the wall by the door and a sign that clearly read ‘To Access Pool Please Swipe Key Card’. Sam pulled his out of his pocket and slid it through the tiny machine. With bated breath, you waited for the red light to turn green knowing when it did you would be granted access to the pool ahead. However, the light stayed its current color. Sam tried again and was met with the same result.

“Dammit,” said Steve, his shoulders slumping at the realization.

“I can get us in!” Wanda exclaimed moving towards the door. She unlocked her phone and muttered ‘JARVIS’ into the microphone. An accented robotic voice responded.

“How can I assist you, Miss Wanda?”

“The door’s locked and—and we wanna swim.”

“Let me see what I can do,” the AI system said.

Wanda held the phone out toward the black box, the handheld device emitting a blue light that scanned the other gadget. Moments later the LED light on the wall turned green and you let out a victorious yelp. Sam swung the door open and the six of you rushed outside. The night air was still warm and thick with humidity but the slight breeze that blew this high up helped keep it bearable. The guys threw their belongings down on the nearest chairs then jumped straight into the lit up pool, water splashing you even from your spot a few feet away.

“Come on,” Natasha pleaded, pulling on your arm as you slipped your sandals off.

Together you walked to the edge of the pool and slid in. The water was remarkably cooler than the air temperature and the difference sent a pleasant shock through your body. Wanda dove in a minute later, her head popping through the surface next to where you and Nat were treading water.

“I didn’t know JARVIS could do that,” you commented.

“JARVIS can do anything,” Wanda responded proudly.

“How badass would it be if it were a real person?” added Nat.

Wanda let out a soft laugh. “Pretty badass.”

You had just opened your mouth to say something else when a pair of arms encircled you from behind and dragged you under the cool surface. Luckily you held your breath in time, releasing it when you were able to resurface. Pushing wet strands of hair out of your face, you whipped around to find a laughing Steve, the obvious culprit.

“You ass!” You cried hitting his arm. You tried to sound angry but to be honest the dip under the water was refreshing and the smile that tugged at your lips showed that. “You’re so gonna pay for that.”

“Oh really?” he questioned with a cocked eyebrow. “You gotta catch me first.”

Those five words started an all-out war between you and your friends as you divided up into teams while you swam around the pool, chasing and splashing each other. Your sides and throat hurt from all your laughing but the temporary pain was worth the memories of the night.

As you competed in a round of chicken –which you and Sam were _totally_ winning – hotel security found you and forced you out of the pool. The guard lectured you on swimming past hours as he escorted you back inside. Thankfully, he was lenient and let you off with a warning, mentioning he understood the highs of being on spring break. When he strolled down the opposite hallway, Bucky was the first to let out a chuckle which led to all of you breaking out in another fit of laughter.

The elevator came and you clambered on, squeezing into the confined space with the others and you were pressed against the back wall with Bucky beside you. Maybe it was the fatigue that started to settle or the lingering effects of the alcohol or something else entirely, but you laid your head on his shoulder. Without missing a beat, he leaned his head against yours and for a few short moments – before the elevator stopped on your floor and the illusion was broken – you were at peace.


	3. Restart

The white sandy shore was crowded with vacationers, most of them on their spring break as well. Rainbow colored umbrellas dotted the beach with various shades of gold, bronze and ebony bodies lying beneath them. Space between the makeshift camps diminished as more people came to relax on the sand, blankets and towels and coolers acting as boundary lines.

Away from the masses of reveling college students was a sectioned off area of the beach filled with plush lounge chairs, identical navy umbrellas and several navy and white striped canvas cabanas. This was where Bucky found himself and his friends settling in the next afternoon. It was their hotel’s private area of the beach where only resort guests could sit and relax, two guards securing the space and checking resort bands for anyone trying to use the facilities unauthorized. Overall, Bucky thought the exclusivity was unnecessary but he couldn’t deny it was nice not having to climb over groups of people just to find a place to sit.

They left their belongings in one of the cabanas and on a pair of lounge chairs in front of it then separated to do various things: Sam and Nat veered to the right to hunt for seashells; you and Wanda padded down towards the water; and Steve and Bucky found an open space to toss a frisbee around. The chatter between them as they played with the disc started off as playful banter but soon Bucky’s mind wandered to the previous night’s events and he was compelled to share his thoughts about it again.

“She had her head on my shoulder.” Bucky tossed the frisbee to Steve before continuing. “It’s been nearly three months since the last time we touched – _three months_ – what am I supposed to think about that?”

Steve hurled the red plastic disc at Bucky; the latter stepping a few spaces back in the sand to catch it. “Can we focus on the fact that you’ve kept count on how long it’s been since you touched your ex?”

Bucky whipped off his sunglasses so that his best friend could see him glaring but his actions only made Steve double over in laughter. Definitely not the desired reaction Bucky was banking on. “Laugh it up, Rogers.”

He chucked the disc towards Steve again. Still smiling, Steve caught it but did not throw it back immediately. “Buck, we had this conversation last night.”

The Frisbee sailed through the air and Bucky caught it as he said, “And?”

“I don’t think anything’s changed in twelve hours.”

“Sorry for wanting to get my best friend’s opinion on the matter.”

Steve reached into the air for the disc after Bucky sent it flying back at him. Sighing, Steve ran a free hand through his hair as he walked over to his friend. “Maybe instead of talking to me about it, you should be talking to her.”

Steve gestured towards the shoreline where you and Wanda were standing in the shallow waters. Bucky’s eyes never left you as you and Wanda waded further out into the ocean; that was until you turned around at the sound of Natasha calling your name and he quickly tore his gaze away, bringing a hand up to rub the back of his neck.

“I can’t,” he said, digging his toes deeper into the sand.

Steve crossed his arms. “Why not?”

“Because.”

Steve rolled his eyes. “Your vast knowledge of the English language is unmatched.”

Bucky punched Steve in the arm but the other guy barely flinched at the contact. All Bucky wanted to do was talk to you – tell you everything that’d been on his mind for the past several months – but the fear of your rejection kept him at bay. He had messed up and he knew it; could anyone really blame him for being hesitant especially when there were still feelings on the line? It was better for all parties involved if he kept his distance no matter how difficult it was for him.

Upon noticing the wounded expression on his friend’s face, Steve’s stance softened and he let his arms fall to his sides. “Look, I’m not saying there’s no chance but you’re never gonna know for sure if you keep hiding from Y/N.”

Bucky clenched his jaw and slid his sunglasses back on, signaling the end of the conversation. He knew Steve was just helping but it was easier said than done admitting to his wrongdoing and asking for another chance. He told Steve he was gonna chill in the cabana for a while, his mind too preoccupied to focus on their game.

Bucky turned on his heel and went back to where the group had left their towels and bags. He flopped down on one of the long lounge chairs, not bothering to move the few items that were scattered on it. He was absentmindedly looking out at the beach in front of him when a figure moving in his direction caught his attention.

Panic seized Bucky as you loomed closer. Should he pretend to be asleep? Get up and walk away, hopefully unnoticed? Bury his head in the sand like an ostrich? It didn’t matter; you had flashed the guard your beach access pass and were already by his side before he could think up how to breathe beneath the sandy surface. His mouth went dry at the sight of you, droplets of water falling from your hair and skin.

“You’re on my towel,” you said pointing to the light green fabric under his butt.

“Oh, shit, sorry!”

Bucky jumped up, grabbing the towel and thrusting it toward you. You gave him a small smile as thanks, taking the item from him and draping it around yourself. The two of you stood there, the lounge chair and a million unsaid words separating you. Bucky shifted his weight, racked his brain for something – _anything_ – to say that wouldn’t push you further away.

“Having fun?” he asked. He mentally kicked himself at the basic question but perked up when you answered it, a blithe lilt to your tone.

“Yeah, I am.”

“Good, good.”

“And you?”

“Oh, yeah, tons.”

Silence fell over you again.

“Okay, well I’m just gonna…” you said breaking the lull and gesturing to the water.

“Yeah, no, that’s cool.”

You dropped your towel on the opposite chair before walking away without a backwards glance. Bucky groaned. _Real smooth, Barnes_ he thought to himself as he turned in the direction of the bar lined street with a need for a drink to wash away his embarrassment.

The bar Bucky ducked into was right on the main road but was camouflaged by two bigger restaurants on either side that seemed to be at war with their clashing music. Inside the dim building, he could only hear the sounds coming from the TVs that jutted out from the walls around the small room. A few other people were taking refuge in the bar yet no one paid him any mind as he made his way to the counter.

“Can I get a Blue Moon?” he asked when the bartender came over.

He took a seat while the server fished his drink out of the cooler below the counter. The bartender slid the bottle to him and Bucky caught it smoothly in his right hand. He wasn’t expecting to stay long – just long enough to have the beer help erase the humiliation that plagued him. When the first bottle was done but he kept replaying your exchange in his head, Bucky knew he’d be here for a while. After ordering and finishing his second beer, he began to feel better about the situation but figured one more wouldn’t hurt. Third time’s the charm, right?

He cracked open the bottle, took a sip then set it back down on the counter as the door swung open and the bell chimed welcoming the new guest. Bucky ignored the interruption opting to toy with his drink instead.

“Hey.”

Bucky looked up from his beer and spun his head to face the voice behind him. He swallowed hard when he met your eye. “Hey.”

“That seat taken?” you asked him, jutting your chin toward the burgundy stool next to him.

Bucky waved an open palm at the chair as he took a heavy swig from the bottle in front of him. He kept his eyes on the brown glass, picking at the label, as you settled in next to him. The scent of the ocean clung to you, mingling with your perfume and clouding Bucky’s senses. He found it difficult not to be enticed.

The bartender wandered back over to take your order – a strawberry mojito, your favorite – and Bucky took this chance to drink you in. The sun had left its mark on your skin, your complexion darker than before you stepped on the beach; you’d put your hair up, showing off the soft curve of your neck. The cover-up you pulled over your swimsuit stuck to the parts of you that were still damp from the water. Bucky lifted his eyes from your form when you called his name, scratching at the back of his neck.

“I hope you don’t mind that I found you.”

Your voice was low as you fidgeted with your hands. Your sudden show of nerves unsettled Bucky especially since during your earlier conversation – if you could even call it that – you seemed more put together. What happened in the short span of time to get you like this? It probably didn’t bode well for him so Bucky took another gulp of beer to calm himself before continuing the discussion.

“Of course not.” He put the bottle down but kept a firm grasp on it, the glass keeping him anchored. “What’s up?”

At this point, the bartender returned with your drink and you took a long sip leaving Bucky waiting for your response. When half your beverage was gone, you spoke up. “I wanted to talk to you.”

This was it. Bucky swallowed the bubble of nausea that crept up his throat. “I’m all ears.”

You stared at him for several long moments causing him to shrink under your gaze. God, why were you prolonging the inevitable? If you never wanted to see or speak to him again, you just needed to rip that bandage off, give him time to adjust to the fresh pain. He could handle it.

Probably.

“We never really talked about our break-up,” you began after taking a deep breath, “and I know there’s still a lot that needs to be said. Our issues have been making things weird in our group for a while now and I really don’t want them to affect this week. So, let’s forget our shit for the time being and just enjoy our last spring break together.”

You finished with a gentle smile that held a lot of hope. Bucky let your words sink in. He knew a discussion about your split would happen eventually and it needed to be done but the prospect of postponing it and just enjoying each other’s company again brought a lopsided grin to his face. It was actually more than he thought he deserved to be honest; but why bring that up?

“I think I can manage that,” he replied, body at ease as he held out his beer.

You grabbed your glass and clinked it against the bottle. You both drank from your respective containers, bright eyes locked on each other. Maybe he could make it through this week after all.


	4. A New Deal

The cool, clear water lapped at your ankles sending a slight shiver through your body as it adjusted to the new temperature. On your right, Wanda took several more steps into the water until it reached her knees.

“Come on, Y/N.” She beckoned you forward as a small wave rolled past her.

You waded out to her and grabbed her outstretched hand as another wave crashed against your legs. You jumped at the impact causing you and Wanda to burst out into giggles. You walked further out still until the water lapped gently at your waists. By now you’d become accustomed to the temperature of the ocean and welcomed the rolling waves that came your way.

“Y/N!”

You spun around at the sound of Nat’s voice calling you from the shore, her bright red hair the perfect marker to find her in the throng of people on the sand. You waved at her and Sam – who was holding up a bucket full of seashells – before a big wave knocked you under the frothy surface. When you came up, sputtering, Wanda was beside you laughing.

“A-are you—okay?” she managed to squeeze out between chuckles.

“I’ll live,” you responded, your throat rough from the salt water and your own laughs you weren’t able to suppress.

You looked over at the shore again to find Nat with her phone out, pointed in your direction as Sam leaned over her shoulder to watch the screen. You stuck your middle finger up knowing full well your best friend was still recording; you might as well provide her with as much material as possible. You and Wanda continued to frolic in the ocean, splashing each other and catching the waves as they tumbled towards you.

Your actions reminded you of the fun in the pool last night, along with feelings you had tried to shut away but that had resurfaced in the presence of Bucky. The little moment you two shared in the elevator didn’t help matters except to prompt you into facing the situation in an attempt to soothe the discomfort that had become a permanent fixture between you.

After discussing The Elevator incident in detail with Wanda and Nat the previous night and Sam's words lingering in your ear, wasn’t it time to clear the air? What could possibly go wrong with telling your ex you wanted to be cordial? Perhaps even friends again, if only for the sake of having a pleasant spring break?

"I'm gonna talk to Bucky," you blurted out. You hoped your tone was relaxed and didn't display the amount of emotion that you were actually feeling.

Wanda turned to you, a perfectly groomed eyebrow arched and a knowing smirk on her face. "Really?"

 _Play it cool_ , you told yourself. "Yeah. It's no big deal."

"When were you thinking about doing it?"

That…was a good question. You hadn't thought about a timeline to be honest. You just knew you'd wanted to speak with him but now that the reality of it had been presented to you, you were feeling a bit apprehensive. "I-uh-you know the timing isn't important."

"Why not now?"

You followed the finger she had pointing back towards the sand. In the distance you could make out Bucky heading toward the lounge chairs while Steve made his way to where Sam and Nat sat in the shallow water. This would be an opportune time to get your feelings out without the whole group breathing down your necks. You looked at Wanda and she gave you an encouraging nudge toward the beach.

"There's no time like the present," she called after your retreating back.

You trudged through the water and sand, your feet feeling ten times heavier as they carried you to your destination. As you got closer to the enclosure, your nerves heightened and it would be so easy for you to just turn around, pretend he wasn't there. But he was and he looked so calm relaxing on the navy cushioned seat, a light sheen of sweat glistening off his bare chest and that lock of stray hair that seemed more at home in front of his eye instead of atop his head fluttering in the breeze. You took a deep breath to steady your racing heart as you stopped by him.

"You're on my towel."

Okay, so not the most ingenious opening line but it was something to get the ball rolling. Bucky jumped up, apologizing profusely before handing you the lime green towel which you wrapped around yourself immediately. Silence fell between you both - a stark contrast to your racing thoughts. So many different phrases kept coming to mind but none were able to fall past your waiting tongue. Fortunately, Bucky spoke up first saving you from the current awkwardness.

"Yeah, I am," you said in response to his inquiry.

"Good, good."

"And you?"

"Oh, yeah, tons."

At a loss for words again, you stood there wishing he could just read your mind. At one point in time, it almost felt like he could - but those days were over. "Okay, well I’m just gonna…"

You gestured toward the water. You had to get away and recollect yourself because obviously this conversation was not meant to happen now. You barely heard his reply before you dropped your towel on the chair behind you and strode back to where the others were gathered in the water. Wanda's smile faltered when she saw you.

"How'd it go?" she asked stepping out of the waves to meet you.

You wanted to lie, pretend all was well but Wanda had a special knack for knowing when you were upset even when you tried to hide it. A heavy sigh fell from your lips. "I choked."

She grabbed your hand and gave it a comforting squeeze. "The day's not over yet; you can do this."

"Easier said than done but thanks, Wanda."

The two of you joined Sam, Steve and Nat in the ocean. Goofing around with them definitely helped to ease your worries about your conversation with Bucky but it also made you think about him more. Before breaking up -- and even before getting into a relationship -- the two of you had been friends. He and Nat were the ones you knew the longest in the group, the two with whom you were the closest. It was odd now not having him share in these moments with you because of the misunderstanding that led to your separation. It still hurt, that was without a doubt, but you missed him and were tired of ignoring him.

A newfound determination fueled you now. You could _do_ this. You turned around to check for Bucky back at the cabana since he hadn't joined the rest of you in the water yet but couldn't locate him. It had been at least thirty minutes since your brief encounter.

"Has anyone seen Buck lately?" you asked, eyes still scanning the sand for any sign of him.

Steve waded over to you, hands on his hips as he too searched the beach. "Not since we finished up our game of frisbee. He said he was gonna chill by the cabana."

"Yeah, I went to talk to him a little after that."

"He could've just gone to the bathroom," Sam suggested from behind you.

"He would have said something, though," Steve said, his voice tinged with worry. "Did he seem okay when you talked to him?" he asked a moment later, leaning closer to you.

"Besides our shared uneasiness, he seemed fine. Why?"

Steve sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "He was pretty upset before he sat down."

"About what?"

Steve shifted his weight, clearly uncomfortable about the topic at hand which could only mean one thing.

"Us," you said for him when he didn't speak up.

He nodded in agreement. What were you supposed to make of this? Was Bucky just as conflicted as you were about your current situation? Or was he fed up with your presence already?

"Do you think he's at a bar?" you suggested.

"Doesn't hurt to look."

You and Steve filled in the others and decided it was best for just the two of you to search for Bucky while the others stayed back in case of his return. You trekked up the sand to your cabana and grabbed your cover-up, sandals and wallet, just in case. Steve threw on his tee and shoes as well and then the two of you hit the busy street. It was lined with various restaurants but you knew better than to waste your time in the loud, rowdy ones.

When Bucky was upset he tended to find his solace in quieter areas and you knew even being in a strange city, he wouldn’t deter from his norm. You passed several establishments that looked to be places he would go, quickly ducking inside to check for him, before finding your luck. Even from the sidewalk looking in, you could tell it was Bucky sitting at the counter of the small unassuming bar. Steve made to enter the building but you put an arm out to stop him.

"No, I'll get him."

He let you pass, opting to wait out front. You stepped inside, the coolness of the air conditioning a welcoming relief from the heat outside. Your eyes darted to where Bucky sat nursing a beer at the table. Despite the racing of your heart and twisted stomach, you moved toward him.

"Hey."

Bucky spun around in his seat, eyes wide at the sight of you. "Hey."

"That seat taken?"

He motioned for you to sit and you slid onto the red stool beside him. The bartender came over and took your drink order - a strawberry mojito to boost your courage.

"Bucky," you started, "I hope you don't mind that I found you."

You fidgeted with your hands, anxious about his response to you being here. He usually liked to stay alone until he worked through his issues enough that he could talk to someone else about them. And seeing as his problem was with you at the moment, you did not feel very confident, but that insecurity was quickly swept away when he answered.

"Of course not. What's up?"

The server returned with your order and you took that opportunity to down half of it before continuing with your conversation. "I wanted to talk to you."

"I'm all ears."

You looked over at Bucky, soaking in his presence. This was it. Once you proposed the idea of being friends to him, the ball was in his court and he would be the one to decide where your relationship headed next. Was it selfish and naively hopeful of you to want him to agree to your terms? 

Probably but you had to try.

You inhaled deeply then began speaking the words that had been on your mind for so long. When you finished, you smiled at him, hoping he would understand how much you wanted this. His expression caused you to be concerned as he mulled over your words but eventually his signature crooked grin appeared.

"I think I can manage that," he said.

You suddenly felt lighter, like a balloon drifting through the sky. You picked up your glass, clinked it against Bucky's waiting bottle and finished it off, your eyes never leaving his. When you were both done, you slid a few bills on the counter to pay for the drinks.

"Fyi, Steve is waiting for us," you mentioned as you got up from your seats.

"He told you about our convo, didn't he?" Bucky wasn't mad as he shook his head but you could tell he was a bit embarrassed.

"Only after I asked. I was worried about where you were."

"I should've known I couldn't hide from you two."

He nudged you with his shoulder, his tone light and playful, as you exited the bar. This was the Bucky you had missed and the one you wanted around for the next several days. At the sight of you, Steve pushed off of the wall he was leaning against and met you both further down the sidewalk.

"Am I allowed to ask how it went?" he questioned falling in line next to you so that you were flanked by them both.

"We're… good," Bucky commented looking down at you, optimism radiating off him.

You smiled brightly in return, his demeanor so infectious it made you forget the sudden swell of anxiety that flared in your core.


End file.
